Great Expectations

Does anyone else find baby goats bloody cute? And not bloody that is linked to the word slaughter, but bloody like.. “amazing”. Nah that doesnt sound any better.

It is near the end of October 2011. And this time last year I was in the USA having an adventure. NYC to be precise if I was to look at where I was this day last year, wondering around Central Park by myself and being asked to take photos of couples who were also exploring Central Park. This highlighted the fact I was alone. Not in a bad way, I just am also more the person to do the Gen Y, take a photo of yourself, type shot. But only when noone was looking. Asif I would wanna see anyone watching me take a self photo at some tourist location. That would make me look like a loser yeah? Well they can be the losers.. yeah… So yes, the trip was amazing and a year on, I still appreciated the time and the company. Yes I was not alone for most of the trip, just a lot of NYC. I need to give the city another chance when I have likeminded friends travelling with me.

Speaking of NYC, is 30 Rock as good as people go on about? I find it amusing at times but there are too many annoying characters to make it amazing.

So. I ate a rissole. What IS a rissole, the Americans may ask? And the Alaskans. Well it is like a large meatball that is flattened, thicker than a beef patty and is cooked often on an Aussie BBQ. Why am I informing the internet that I ate one. Well,it wasnt just any old rissole. The pub I was at, had a buffet dinner. You paid $7.50 and could eat all you wanted from a selection of potato salad, caesar sald, sausages, chicken bits (cause I am unsure what part of the chicken’s form they were from) and rissoles. I had two rissoles and thought, “yum”. Later that evening the buffet was packed up and I happened to be standing nearby. I cant deal with seeing food going to waste, so I was apalled to see them place the leftover meat in the alfoil tray and then this tray thrown in the bin. I mentioned to a mate with me that I could have had another rissole. He said, “Well why dont you?” I am always prepared to take on some bit of a dare. So I reached down and took a rissole out of the bin. Yes, I said that sentence. I justified and hey, I am still justifying that it was in a metal tray on the top of the bin. Others argue back, Lloyd, it was in the bin.
So I took a bite. Before I did, I noticed mine had a piece of cheese or mustard on top. It was inside a badly lit pub so couldnt tell. And then I chewed. I got the sudden texture and flavour of minted chewing gum combining with beef flavour. That was not cheese and/or mustard but gum. Some random person’s gum. I froze, trying not to allow my senses to continue to inform me, gum and beef are in your mouth. This did not work.
You know those situations where you are standing in a group and you just did something a tad embarrassing, yet you want to pretend you didnt. Yep, that was me. Though everyone was slightly aware I had eaten it but if I spat it out my only option would be to do that into my hand (all class here!) The whole experience was worse inside my mouth than the potential embarrassment so I spat it out.
“Um, did you realise that it was from the bin and your morals fought against you?”, Said a mate.
“Yeah.. it was cold..”
Small chuckle followed.
But then.. no.. the story of what happened, I couldnt keep it in. It was apalling and needed to share.
“There was gum on that rissole”
You can picture their reactions if it is anything like your own right now, and I am still being called Dumpster Diver…

A good friend of mine messaged me yesterday, informing me he wished to take a break from our friendship. He listed his reasoning and wished me all the best with everything. Naturally I was surprised and also baffled as to his reasoning. And I am not going to use my blog to defend myself, I am always happy to put up my hand if I am doing something wrong or if I suck at something. People are the most important thing to me. But my response simply is, some friendships you fight for, sometimes you cant. It is sad either way, and dislike disappointing people. We all have great expectations somewhere along the line.

My mate Joseph would like me to knit jumpers for penguins who are effected by the oil spill in NZ. I only have red wool, will they be confused? Would red penguins be outcasts?

I always find I am easily distracted by Wikipedia. I click from one article to the next as they all link in with each other. I was asked just before, “what are you up to?”. Naturally I was reading a Wikipedia article on the mystery behind Australia’s old Prime Minister Harold Holt who went missing and presumed dead off the coast of Victoria in the 1960s. And before that, I wanted to know about penguin jumpers.


Oats are sitting in a clear plastic tub beside my desk. Supposedly they have been doing so since one of the first weeks of starting at my current job. I could eat porridge everyday of the year. Except when I wanted Vegemite toast or Corn Flakes. And somehow I wonder if there is judgemental thoughts that I still have these same rolled oats in the container and why have I not eaten them? The air inside too stale? Or maybe they just are not organic, steel-cut oats. Cause a book said once that its what you gotta eat. The cheap pack may have been cut by a second best pair of scissors.

I have been wanting to write about my adventure to Hobart. I only really realised how much of a story it is until I have verbally told people a few times now. And hey maybe it IS a verbal story that makes it a story? I may be setting myself up for a fall. But I do notice I do a lot of things these days so they can be stories. Isnt that what life is for? Dont worry, next entry will be simply the story, a teaser is awesome aint it. A flight to Hobart and back in one day, that wasnt paid by me but a complete stranger.

I went to Sydney last weekend and landed back to Melbourne last week. I had an amazing time for several reasons.

Though how did I initially get to Melbourne airport to head to Sydney you ask? That is usually the next question.
Well I had a text from a mate the night before I was flying out and he said. “Hi mate, me and my friend are on our way to Melbourne. We are moving to Melbourne and are 4 hours away! We have been volunteering on a nudist farm in Byron Bay for the last four months and now my mate is looking for a space in Melbourne where he can busk without having a license as he is broke.”
It is the sort of text most people receive on a Friday night and so I shrugged and asked him where he was staying.
“Some place just on the outskirts of Melbourne, sleeping in our van”.
Of course! Then naturally I thought, well my place is free for the next four days so I would let them stay at mine. I offered, he was stoked and they headed to mine. They said they would drop me off at the airport the next morning as a small thank you. I obliged and thought that was really nice and we said pleasantries and went to sleep. Bright and early we jumped into this van, that was scattered with boys stuff. They had to shift a lot of random shoes and gas bottles out of the way so I could fit in. And then we were off! Navigating through the CBD in the early hours of a Saturday was simple and we drove up onto the freeway. The E-Tag chimed in and both of them went, “Thanks Christians!”. Supposedly the previous owners were a Christian couple who sold the old Tarago van for $900. Though seems they had forgotten to deregister the E-tag for tollways.
As it got lighter and the airport drew near, I was staring off in front of me. The front car seat where my mate sat looked like a front car seat. Though I noticed little whisps of smoke. Well, maybe smoke, or maybe steam? “Er.. guys.. there is some sort of gas like substance rising out of your seats…”
“Ohhh she is doing it again! Cool down baby, cool down..” Seems the van was heating up, and we passed the 2.5KM sign to the airport. I looked at my watch and I had 25 minutes to go.
“Do you mind if we pull over and cool her down?”
What other option did we really have.
Pulled over. Stopped. Opened the front car seat and exposed the engine, and a gush of steam escaped, peeling into the back seat with me and five odd shoes and a sleeping bag. This reminded me of the time when I was 7 and our family van broke down in the snow on a family ski holiday. That was not fun. And we got to know the town of Cooma way too well.
The boys had forgotten to place the cap back on the cool thingy. They filled it up with water and screwed it on. Seat clicked back into place, boys jumped in and doors shut. Engine started and indicator clicked on, we were on our way again. She chugged along and steered up the ramp to the departures. Thank you Tarago! With time to spare.

I walked into a wall inside my own Exhibition yesterday. You would think that after 8 months of walking through the same space I would not, but no, my eyes were still adjusting to a darker part of the galleries and SMACK. It also had to be during a really busy period. And as a lot of humans do, just kept walking and pretended it did not happen. The security guard and my colleague Kitty did not pretend this did not happen.

Back to thoughts on Sydney, I got to see my new nephew, Eden. He looked a bit pissed off that he was outside of the womb. As you would be, so many sights and smells and noises that you just suddenly have thrown around you and will continue to have happen to you for the rest of your life. The smiles will begin to come.

I also got to spend a sunset by Sydney harbour. It really cannot be beaten in its beauty, and with the warm spring air and the stillness around, it was beautiful. Caleb was with me and we got to have fun taking photos and being a bit creative, subtly trying to outdo each other with our ideas. That part was fun. This was a combined effort:

And this was all Caleb’s idea this time:

I also got to visit my other brother, sister in law and their two awesome little girls. It is special to come back each time and see how much they have subtly changed and how their personalities keep sprouting and forming. Last time I saw my littlest niece she was quite shy and still quite baby like, three months later she is a cheeky and happy little girl, very keen to cling onto me and watch everything. Now this might just sound a tad gushy from a proud uncle and yes, apologies. But it just really makes you appreciate every little step.

And this is one of my favourite songs right now. Groove it up!!